How to be a SMART woman in love
By Bricadena, eHow Member
Ok so, there she goes. She is in love and she has fallen hard!
What does she do next?
What does she do next?
She gives it up.
No not sex, that could or could not have happened here.
What does she give up?
Herself; her interests; her time with mom shopping at the mall; Her time with her friends, her single friends (Don't you hate it when as soon as a man walks into your female friends life, they sort of fall off the planet?)
Her hobbies-she used to run threex a week. Alternatively, go to the gym, or read a book a week. She might have enjoyed taking her dog to the beach whatever it is! She put herself and her likes aside so she could spend more "quality time" with her man.
Only problem is that just when she 'gives it all up ', she is no longer the woman that her man fell in love with.
So what does it mean again to be a 'smart woman' in love?
Know one truth about love and relationships.
Number 1 is you must love your man unconditionally without losing yourself.
I will tell you that is one of my biggest fears.
To be so engrossed in a man's life that I start to neglect my own life.
Here is a scenario that illustrates it wonderfully, in the scene of a movie called Blue Crush, a tale of a young woman struggling between her dream of surfing the famous and dangerous waves in Hawaii, "The Pipeline" and pitching it all for her new "Football player boyfriend."
Girl: What do I do?
Guy: Just be the girl that I met at the beach.
Girl: And what was she like?
Guy: She would never ask a man what to do.
Damn! What a decision to make!
To surf the most treacherous and dangerous wave on this planet and be a champion surfer chick or keep the guy!
Gee, the decisions women have to make.
Let me ask you this, what do you think the man would choose if the tables were turned?
I still get chills when I hear or read those lines, how powerful it would be to stay the same as when a man first met you and fell in love.
That is where that saying must come from, "Men marry woman hoping they never change and women marry men hoping they will."
This is something I am learning and it is like a light bulb flashing in my head.
Lose your sense of self and you most certainly will lose the guy.
"But, I don't have any interests other than finding me a man".
Well if you think this way, you have already lost in the game of love.
If a woman defines herself by the man she is with, she is no more a puppet, moving and acting by hands of her man's desires and not her own.
That is no way to live.
You had some kind of life before you met him and you gain nothing from giving it all up for him.
Well what if I don't have any interests or hobbies, what if I don't even know who I am?
Being a smart woman in love means this, do not losing yourself in the process.
Things You’ll Need:
Relationship
clear mind
self-love
Instruction:
Step 1
Don't change yourself to please the man in your life.
Step 2
Keep your interests even if they are different from him. You love rock concerts and he does not like crowds. Don't opt to stay in with him, go to your concert with your friends and then when you see him later that evening you will have so much to talk to him about.
Step 3
Let him be an great addition to your already wonderful life. Too often women start to revolved their entire life around the man they are dating and that is when things start to change.
Article Source: http://www.ehow.com/how_4614558_be-smart-woman-love.html
